February is a unique month for many reasons. It is the month when spring starts to unfold gently, when the skies turn cornflower blue and celebrated as a time of love through Valentine’s Day. For many, the gentle turning of the grey winters into a myriad of blues & greens brings joy & togetherness. In the same manner, humankind is becoming surprisingly lonely as we become technologically connected. More and more people feel isolated as we look at our screens rather than at each other. So it comes as no surprise that Valentine’s Day is savored and disdained in equal measures.
What if I told you, that research shows that more suicides occur during the spring and summer months? Generally, one may associate the winters as a time associated with depression due to the cold weather and grey skies. But contrary to belief, evidence suggests that suicides begin in spring and continue to peak throughout summer.
Does this have something to do with the expectation of having a loved one with us, to be adulated and have our companionship celebrated? Does Valentine’s Day bring to our glaring attention of how love is a big deficit in our lives? Or do we feel seemingly bitter in the wave of others celebrating their fulfilling relationships through a show of flowers, hugs, dinners and special events?
Well, let me tell you, you are not alone in this feeling! Perhaps the only thing that you know for sure on Valentine’s Day is that if you are hurting there are thousands of others who feel the same way. Somewhere, this gap feels harsher because we forget to celebrate and love the greatest person in our life; YOU.
Yes, You! You, reading this blog. You, working hard every day of the year. You, wanting to receive love as a human promise of life. Somewhere, in the rut of surviving, we forget that we exist too and that love is an integral part of our life cycle, regardless of who we receive it from.
So, how does one begin to appreciate oneself, celebrate our own selves?
As with most of our personal battles, the first step to any change comes from acceptance. To acknowledge that we feel a certain way about ourselves, perhaps there are some things we would like to change. This is a gentle way of beginning to look inwards and acquire a sense of trusting who we are. You will be surprised at how often we self-deprecate. “Oh, I don’t eat healthy food, I don’t exercise enough, I am very aggressive, I lose my temper with my family/loved ones, I am not patient, I am not skilled, basically I am not good enough!”
It is important to accept that most people feel the same way and that thinking like this serves no good purpose. It only serves to delude our sense of well-being. Therefore, accepting self is the first step towards allowance.
How allowance helps us is that it allows us to not be vested in the outcome of our desires. It helps us to not to be bogged down by fears, inhibitions and judgments. As we accept our shortcomings and begin to bring love into our lives, we must not be adamant about what/who shows up. If we begin to worry about the outcome, it will amount to seeking control. Allowance helps us understand that we should organically enable movement of good energies into our lives.
Next is to affirm good thoughts about your well-being. We all know that thought and words have impact. That is why we react wonderfully to statements like, “You have handled your situation really well” and we feel poorly if anyone says, “You didn’t pass your university exam.” That’s why, when we use affirmative statements at regular intervals, it helps to change our vibe, our energy. Imagine you are being applauded; your skills are being celebrated every day. You will notice a subtle but a definite change in the way you perceive yourself.
Have you ever done a simple Personal Gratitude Exercise? Write down 5 statements that you appreciate about yourself. It can be as simple as, “I have a nice smile” or “I bake very good cookies.” Feel good about these words as you write them down. Be aware of the warm feelings they give you. Think deeply and write them down in a purposeful way. Read them a couple of times and smile at each one. If you don’t feel like writing them down, then take 5 minutes each time you shower or dress for the day. Stand in front of the mirror, look at yourself and say your Personal Gratitude Statements aloud. Say them with feeling, with a smile, with gentleness.
Make this a daily habit. Begin with 21 days. As you start to affirm positive things about your life, you will begin to think with the same frequency too. This will begin to manifest as a higher energy around your aura. As your aura exudes a higher vibration through positive beliefs, you will notice a change in how other people will respond to you. Like attracts like and your upbeat energy will attract similar responses from your family and friends.
Valuing ourselves is the foremost step towards empowering our emotional acuity. As we juggle more and more situations as an adult, we tend to lose ourselves in the mayhem of life. Keep sharpening the saw. Keep reminding yourself of your worth. If it helps to be part of a group that celebrates each other, then it helps keep momentum. This Valentine’s, realize your love for who you are. You are your best friend. Love Thyself!
If you would like to take a workshop with us, book a healing session or would like to know more about alternative healing modalities, feel free to contact us @ +91- 8800006786. Our panel of advisors, led by Dr. Chandni Tugnait would love to work with you!