In the words of Abraham Lincoln, “It is difficult to make a man miserable while he feels worthy of himself”.

Since childhood, every experience, interaction, environment, situation and person we encounter, leaves a deep impact on our self-worth. Often in the quest to be better we are left with the feeling of not being ‘good enough’.

Self-worth is the sense that we deserve to be loved and cared for; to be alive. This is not the same as self-esteem as that is more to do with the things that we believe we can achieve, our strengths, values, stamina, accomplishments, skills, position, etc. In contrast, self-worth is different from our strengths and accomplishments. It is more about our sense of deserving to be alive with love & joy.

Self-esteem depends on how we feel about ourselves which keeps changing. However, self-worth does not change, no matter how we feel as it is a direct measure of how we value and regard ourselves.

Mostly we aren’t clear about this difference and unknowingly we link our self-worth to our possessions & achievements and hence, as soon as we experience a loss or failure in any aspect of life, we experience low self-worth and begin to question our worthiness to be loved, cared for or to even be alive.

Let’s understand this better.

What prompts us to feel unworthy?

When we fail to do what is expected out of us by the family, friends, community and society, we lose their approval and this gets us to experience rejection & unworthiness. Most of the assessments made of us are made silently, unknowingly and unconsciously.

Some factors are as follows –

  • Constant comparison on looks, status, choices, position, achievements, etc. destroys our confidence.
  • Our educational system assesses us based on standard grades & scores, thereby destroying our individuality.
  • The need for love and appreciation from our parents for all our achievements pushes us to achieve ‘more’, sometimes at the cost of our personal choice.
  • The ads on TV and social media tell us how we need to spend more money and change in order to be successful, loved and acceptable.
  • The number of likes and followers on our social media pages and handles is the new parameter to measure our worthiness.

These and many more factors add to the pressure and are responsible for low self-worth in most individuals.

Low self-worth can impact one’s confidence and can also lead to self-criticism wherein one is either finding excuses to not do what needs to be done or is constantly blaming self (or others) for something or the other. When we indulge in these, we are unable to stick to a plan, to focus, to take calculated risks, to commit or to even act.

In the long run, low self-worth begins to impact our relationships with others as well.

How can we build self-worth?

  1. Awareness:

    Get to know self at a deeper level. Ask yourself, “Who am I?, Who am I not?, How do others see me?, What brings me joy?, Where do I struggle most?, What habitual emotions hurt me?, What abilities and skills do I have?, etc. These questions will help you understand yourself in a profound way, thereby laying down a strong foundation for self-worth.

  1. Acceptance:

    Accept everything about you – your looks, your style, your body, your way of doing things, the works! The constant need to change self (which is stemming from lack and not self-love) makes us feel that there is something wrong with us and so we refuse to accept ourselves the way we are. Focus on the things you like about yourself. You are worthy the way you are.

  1. Forgiveness:

    Forgive yourself for all your past mistakes and drop all the judgments and excuses. Accept yourself with all the flaws or limitations – be authentic and real! Forgive yourself as well as others for letting the outside forces define you. Embrace self.

  1. Connections:

    Connect with people who are supportive. Don’t just crave for attention or appreciation from people for temporary boost to self-esteem. Build connections with self, with people; have meaningful conversations, see people and things for what they are and enjoy these connections.

  1. Decisions:

    Be in the driver’s seat of your life. Be courageous to free yourself from rules that bog you down and instead work towards being you. Understand yourself, accept yourself, love yourself, take responsibility for your life and use your personal power to decide & to act. Don’t get swayed by external chaos & mess. Drop the judgments, limitations, assumptions, conclusions and excuses. Trust yourself and hold your power; you are worth it!


Remember to cultivate self-worth and not wait for a certain someone to come and love you for you to finally feel worthy. 

Feel worthy because you are!

Are you willing to be worthy?

Reach Dr. Chandni’s support team at +918800006786  and book an appointment.


  1. good I found you, need some guidance for myself on the professional front, getting in touch from Contact Tab on your site

  2. Never thought my behaviour of constant comparison could be so dangerous for me. Thank you for guiding me through this article of yours

  3. Read your article on TOI and landed on your blog section, you give answers to complex issues so well, thank you for your contribution

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Meet Your Life Coach & Healer

Dr. Chandni Tugnait is MD in Alternate Medicines, Psychotherapist, Life Coach & Healer with over 14 Years of experience. She is internationally Certified Facilitator & Practitioner in Access Bars, Access Body Processes, EFT - Emotional Freedom Technique, Angel Healing along with Card Reading, Theta Healing, Energy Healing, Aura Cleansing, Chakra Healing, Abundance Magnetizing & Color Therapy among many others. Read Dr. Chandni’s Story
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We changed their lives and here they send us reasons to smile !
Priceless words of honour.

I have known Dr Chandni for only 6 months. Yet today I consider her part of my family and my being. When I met her, I was exhausted with life and with myself. Not only did her session uplift & transform my physical body but I was grounded like I havent been in 8 years. Highly knowledgeable, able to answer your deepest questions, full of light and exuberance, I havent seen any energy healing so significant and long lasting. Im privileged to receive wellness from her and I know that Im never alone. My association with her is for life and her specialness is above the heavens for me.

Ms. Rosy Singh
Corporate Trainer, Delhi

I was part of the session with Dr. Chandni Tugnait and so many friends asked me about my experience. The following analogy reflects some parts of the experience -The best of Buddhas disciple gave their quantifiable findings but when it came to Andanda, his closest one, he had tears in his eyes and responded in a single sentence – “I don’t know”.Buddha responded emotively, you have me in you. One has to experience it to believe in the healing process in totality.
Thanks a lot for your contribution Chandni

Mr. Gurpinder Singh Vohra
Founder Kriti Creation
New Delhi

Best person in town , all courses and learning content is awesome n really insightful

More power to her, she is changing the life of many people with her holistic healing techniques and helping in removing limiting beliefs of people and unleashing the power within them to get healthy and successful life.

Anketaa Sachdev

At times i wonder where does she keep it all. Such compassion – non judgmental, ever accessible, invaluable. It’s got to be a fountain within her that flows incessantly for the wary soul. No matter what your wound is, the magical waters of this fountain can cure all. And it was magic that got me to this fountain. For I had neither met her nor known her, at-least not in this lifetime! The first time i spoke to her, her compassion cut through my dense energy.

Qatar (UAE)

Chakra Balancing 5 days WhatsApp Workshop: It was well organised course, data was shared in time. Meditations were really helpful. All the details about chakra and different ways to clear and balance them were shared in a simple but effective way.

I am really grateful to be associated with Gateway of Healing.
Thank you 😊

Mrs. Jaswinder Kaur

It sure was nice meeting Dr. Chandni Tugnait.
The participants liked her talk.
It was nice and interactive – just what we wanted.

Ms. Mamta Saxena
IFC, World Bank

It was indeed a great honor for me to be trained by Ms. Chandni on my first visit to India. Not only did she teach us techniques on improving our proficiency in the English Language but also helped us to be able to communicate effectively with people from different cultures. The sessions with Ms. Chandni are always fun & informative. Even after hours of training with her, there is no sign of tiredness or lethargy. I extend my gratitude to you for teaching us how to be BETTER THAN THE BEST!!

Robbi Adhilni

Every teacher educates but only a few enlighten and Chandni ma’am is one of them. Besides having outstanding teaching methods, she is also very skilful and enthusiastic. And the best part is she never settles for what she and her students have accomplished. I owe a lot to her in terms of motivation, enlightenment and most importantly for making me a good human being. Her words of motivation “YOU ARE BETTER THAN THE BEST” always are a major source of ENCOURAGEMENT..

Nitasha Panda

Ms. Chandni is a fine young lady who simply touched my heart during my visit to India. Although she is my daughter’s age but the ease with which she handled our group of 40 odd people from different countries and different cultures, left me spellbound. English was never a problem for me but this young girl, who I proudly call my teacher, taught me some very interesting things. I wish you the best of luck in everything that you do. Smile as often as you can. May the Lord bless you!

Joseph, Diplomat
Sudan, Africa

Ms. Chandni Tugnait – You are simply WOW! Thank you for making me aware of the flaws in my language.

Abbas Ali

Ms. Chandni is someone who sets an example and acts as an inspiration for all her trainees. She full of knowledge and wants the best of us as students. A saying of her that I want to share with u all (that brought difference in my life) :

Saluna Koebeer
Suriname (South America)

I’m really thankful to Chandni Ji for bringing the awareness in me and helping me in empowering myself through the various workshops conducted by her. Not only am I more confident and happy now but also more capable of helping others by healing different issues in their lives. Thanks for always being there to guide me.

Soniyah Sharrmaa
New Delhi

I’m really glad I attended the Serenity Surrender Basic Workshop with Chandni Ma’am. I’ll be indebted to you all my life for showing me the path of self empowerment. I had put myself in the gentle and capable hands of my guide and mentor ‘Chandni Tugnait Sharma’ and found that my opinion of myself, and my beliefs in the cycles of karma changed forever. The sessions and workshops have helped me develop my full potential, unlock hidden talents, and create more compassion and love for myself and others. Love You Ma’am.

Gauri Dhiman
New Delhi

I shall be eternally grateful to my sister-in-law for helping me uncover the fantastic laws of Universe and exposing me to the world of great mysticity and grandeur. Nothing seems impossible for me now. I get all that I desire and much more. One workshop changed so much for me. I, now, truly believe that nothing is unachievable in this abundant Universe.

Saurabh Sharma
New Delhi

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